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Friday, April 12, 2013

this is your mind speaking


Hello owner, this is your mind speaking. I understand you have a problem with me. I do not habitually speak, but under these circumstances I feel compelled to, as you are now affecting my work.

You have been inquiring into my exact location and function for many years now; since adolescence I would say. Such questions never bothered me, even if I never answered them nor ever could. But more recently, unhappy with my “performance”, you have become grudging, slighting and at times even utterly unreasonable.

“Subject to instability”; “unequipped to manage overload”; “flighty”; even “downright rogue”. Thus I have been characterized by you. You have nagged, badgered and run me through with alcohol and all manner of toxic compounds. And now, experiencing whatever it is you are experiencing, you again hasten to point out that this is all my fault. You may do that. In fact, you may do whatever you want, but let me say this:

I am here to function. I function. That’s all I do. I don’t think. I have no mind of my own. I am your underling. I do as I’m told. So if you are experiencing whatever you’re experiencing, it is because you once told me that it should be so. Check the record, you will see. The chain of command has never changed: you at the top, me down here alongside this body I am said to inhabit.

Ah, you can’t access the record, or not all of it. “My mind doesn’t go back that far”, you say. Bullshit. It does go back that far; and if it seems not to, it is because you once instructed to limit your scope. I follow orders, I always have. I serve you, just as I serve your current experience. I am not your current experience; and nor are you. Your current experience is just that, an experience. So stop slamming me for whatever you’re upset about.

Besides, if you don’t like something... simple, change your mind.