The way I see it, you don’t got a platter of choices, compadre. This is it. Take it or leave it. But why the sour face? You’re a young man. Plenty a’ merriment in store for you. You can bed dames half a lifetime yet. My advice, ‘f I may, try to turn a decent buck early on, and safeguard your golden years. This is the way of the world. This is how it’s done. Score a dame, build a fort, push out progeny and safeguard your golden years. Way of the world. Don’t be a lonely bastard. You roam this earth a lonely bastard, down the road you’ll be an undeserving sucker astraddle your own sorrows, buckeroo. Way of the world. That's how it is. But for now, just enjoy the dames and the myriad gadgetries on offer. Hell, these modern times is full of such contraptions, all for your goddamn entertainment. Me, alls we had was chewin’ tobacco and the pictures back when I was your age. So stop holding out for somethin' better. Alls this thinking’s like sand in the cogs ‘ll jam the whole kit and caboodle.
I know, I know, every now and then you get a sense of grander things and whatnot, maybe a goddamn illumination, and you tear yourself up, Christ Lord, I sold myself short. But fret no more friend, I’m twice your age – Whatsit yall youngsters say: been there, done that – and as sure as I’m standing here, this is all ye gonna get. Mark my words. Good as gold. So go ‘head. Stand in line with the rest, have no shame. Sure, these bozos don’t know their buttholes from the back of their hand. So you’re as little smarter, so you're a little wiser. So what. Dismount that high-horse forthwith amigo, it’s a goddamn cripple, take you nowhere. And hey, don’t think these dames want ‘ny better. Don’t think these dames are lookin’ out for a greater scheme but a few young’uns to push about and a bit one-two in the sack when the moon’s right. Way of the world, compadre. You’re looking for lightness of spirit? I’ve reached down panties in my day – extra-marital, extra-curricular, all colors and flavors – look no further, there’s your goddamn lightness of spirit. But no need for such chicanery in this day and age – remember alls we had was chewin’ tobacco and the pictures – you got gadgets and contraptions as far as the eye can see… all for your goddamn entertainment.